The most important lesson I have learned, and am still learning, from unschooling is LETTING GO. Letting go of the urge to control how things are going to play out.
Naturally, things are different once you have children. Actually, nothing ever goes the way you think it will anymore. Ever. Not that this is a bad thing. There are many enjoyable moments to be had. And things become more fun in many ways.
There is no way my daughter will let me stay in my comfortable corner with my control buttons pushed. NO. WAY.
Kids are not conditioned by society yet. They are often free from previous wierd societal misconceptions that things are a certain way and that you can’t act outside of these restrains. But you can, actually.
And so when things seem to be out of control and you feel like it is really not how it should be, maybe the healthiest thing to do is to go with the flow, to resist resisting, to experience the moment and open up to it with an open mind and heart.
This way the feelings that are restraining you from enjoying yourself will clear away and you will have a much more pleasant experience.
From travelling and unschooling at the same time I have learned that asking for help is not scary. Most people when asked for help will do what they can to acommodate your needs. Most people will smile and be friendly and understanding.
I have learned that people are friendly and understanding.
I have learned that it is okay to not be able to do everything by yourself.
I have learned that letting go of your inner control system is invigorating.
Of course. The practice of letting go is an ongoing theme for me. I have been practicing for a long time. Our unschooling lifestyle is helping me to learn to let go and cultivate a respectful relationship with my daughter rather than one based on control and power paradigms.
And so. What am actually talking about when I say letting go?
With letting go I mean trust that the day will fun and enjoyable, no matter what happens. Trust that you and your child are able to tackle whatever happens. Trust that the people who don’t understand you anyway will stay out of your way if you just do live your life the way you want to. Trust that you will feel empowered if you let your fears go.
Actually, this is as much a note to myself as to anyone who’s reading.
Seize the day. You have everything to lose.